Part 1 of List to Do Before I Die [LTDBID]: Buffy Wannabe

[Also on MS Blog]

I'm morbid. I have issues with death and loss. So I think a lot about things that I want to do before I die. The list is quite long, so I decided to list it in themes. This first theme is movie-style stunts/violence that I want to experience. I decided to write these down so that I will get them done eventually.

1. I want to roudhouse kick someone to the face
2. I want to pistol whip someone
3. I want to flip someone over my shoulder but then step on their neck.

To clarify, I don't want to do this to some innocent person just walking down the street (though, really, who is innocent when you think about it?) But I will have to have some sort of screening method so that I'm not just assaulting people. It would be easy enough if there was a blatant reason for this - like if they were a zombie and about to eat my brains. However, as much as I want to, I have yet to see a zombie. Also, what if someone says "Oh, she's a zombie" meaning just an apathetic person. But in my zeal to see a zombie, and perform some awesome superhero feat, I go after someone who's just smoked too much pot. And if I ever went to the Baltimore Zombie Walk (http://www.baltimorezombiewalk.com), how would I know who was a real zombie? That would be a great place to hide if I were a zombie, though. But I doubt they think that strategically.

Preferably, I will be saving someone besides myself by performing said acts of violence. Like saving a baby from a lycanthrope. Though that might be a horrible generalization - how do I know that all lycanthropes are bad? They may be unfairly maligned - I don't have much experience with them, unfortunately (nothing fun ever happens to me).

Crap - just realized, should probably have supernatural powers to do this. Well, since I wasn't a "chosen" one that I know of and I wasn't born on Krypton, I am crap out of luck. Unless there is some nuclear fallout or if I am experimenting with gamma radiation. Bullshit, man, bullshit.

OK, so that's my first list. Obviously, after having discussed it a bit, it is clear that I just want to be Buffy.