My theory on space aliens. . .

Space aliens are among us. However, I would think that before they sent their spies to live among us that they would train them in our ways. Obviously, their trainers in the art of humanity are similar to our federal government workers in the USA, ie, useless.

This is my only theory as to why people in front of me at the grocery store are so fucking stupid. I can't imagine that people could be this goddamned stupid and still be able to breath. I was at the Giant of Doom across the street from my house yesterday. This Giant is normally awful and apparently where space aliens are thrust into our world. But on Friday it was horrific.

I was getting two things (ok, I'll admit it pie and diet Ginger Ale for my dinner - horrible, I know). All the lines are all the way back to middle Earth and I join the one that seems the shortest, but still so far back that Gollum asked me if I had the ring. Fuck. So I finally get to the point where I can SEE the register, after 10 excruciating minutes. There are only three people in front of me. The woman currently being helped is the most ridiculous specimen in the world. She is asking about the price of everything as it rings through. And she is wearing a sweatshirt with appliqued cats on it - you know, the QVC kind. And there is a man with her, who has a shirt on that says "I Love Jesus" or some other type of "I'm a Christian and you are going straight to hell beause no one can love Jesus more than I." The manager had to come over no less than 4 times to void out things that this dumb bitch decides she doesn't want after it's all been rung up. Then she pays in exact fucking change with the majority of currency in pennies.

The man behind her has like 30 groceries in the 10 item or less line. The old lady behind him was bitching to him about the fact that he had like 30 groceries. And he is feigning that he doesn't know English (maybe he didn't, but whatever). She keeps this up, and it is just fueling my rage. I can't even read the tabloids, I am just staring balefully at the fucking retards in front of me. The non-English speaking man has to pay at this point - and it's like he is completely amazed by this concept - using bills and/or a credit card in exchange for goods. Another 10 minutes of pain and he is out. I am about to gouge my eyes out.

There is no other explanation - these people are aliens. How else can they be so ridiculously dumb?

Corporate America Can Kiss My Fat Ass

Maybe I am premenstrual. And I am anti-work. But I still think this is a valid complaint.

So my boss took me into her office to tell me that I shouldn't take so much overtime. OK, I get that. It messes with the budget. I am taking on more work because I am bored with the work I had and wanted added challenges. But this pushes me into overtime because I also have my regular work. But if you don't want me to do extra work, then I guess I won't. But it pisses me off - I am actually trying to work harder and take on more responsiblity. Apparently a work ethic like that isn't appreciated - so I guess I will just work below my capacity, just do what is assigned, not be proactive and put more on my coworkers (who are salaried).

So last week I work just 40 hours. And she rejects my timesheet because she says I didn't record an absence. I had a dr. appt., so I had to leave the office at 3:30. But I came in at 7:30 so that I would get the full 8 hours in. How is that an absence? I guess I can put sick time in for the time from 3:30 to 6:00, but guess what? Then I will be in overtime. What do they want from me?

So I guess I will just do my job and leave. No more taking extra responsibility, no more trying to help out and take on more projects. I get the same review whether I do or don't. And I get the same review result whether I work at 70% or 100% or 110%. So why should I bother? Where is the incentive? It will relieve my boredom, but I guess in corporate America, boredom is par for the course.

Of course, I will probably keep working hard because I am a sucker. There is no incentive and I am just going to keep plowing on for the elusive reward of being paid enough to afford cable television (which I have anyway, I just can't afford). One day I will be rewarded, right? Right? Probably not, but I can hope.

So basically I am one with the Mexicans - hard working, taken for granted and underpaid. Viva Mexicanas!

Together, Sandie & I have a real disease

Sandie and I were researching our various disorders last night. She gets hemangiomas in her foot - hemangiomas are blood filled tumors. I have ITP - which is a form of thrombocytopenia, which means that I don't have platelets. During our research, we found a disorder called Hemangioma-Thrombocytopenia Syndrome.

Hemangioma-Thrombocytopenia Syndrome (also known as Kasabach-Merritt Syndrome) is a rare disorder characterized by an abnormal blood condition in which the low number of blood platelets causes bleeding (thrombocytopenia). The thrombocytopenia is found in association with a benign tumor consisting of large, blood-filled spaces (cavernous hemangioma). The exact cause of this disorder is not known.

So the weird part is that she gets hemangiomas and I get thrombocytopenia - so together, we have the one syndrome. I just though that was weird.

Television is the devil, but oh, how I love my stories. . .

So instead of watching the pile of work on my desk pile up, I decided to do some web surfing. There is a site for people who want to stop watching television. Intrigued by the idea of a television-less life, I read some more. People who actually live their lives instead of watching other people live their lives vicariously through fictional stories seem to do more things with their lives. They go hanggliding, they ride horses, they do things that you see people on the herpes commercials do.

However, they are isolated from their coworkers and popculture in general. They are adult version of homeschooled kids - really nice, and you wish that you had such a great education, but you only want to be them in theory. Television is a common link between most people.

Television was my second love, after books. I watched some truly awful shows that provided hours of vicarious living in middle school - The Young Riders and Baywatch being two specimens of awesomeness that I used to watch. I have cultivated my tastes now to include such gems as Strangers with Candy, The Office (because it is much funnier than my own office), 24 (again, much more interesting than my office), watch home improvement shows (but don't actually do any home improvement - so much easier to watch it and far more entertaining), The Colbert Report (so much more interesting than regular news) and of course any CW drama series on DVD - currently, Veronica Mars and Angel. I am perfectly happy curling up on my awesome couch (it really is great) and watching some television on my own or with my incredibly wonderful boyfriend (though anyone is welcome as long as you appreciate).

Sometimes the bf makes me go outside and walk. I like nature - nature is great. And DVDs & DVR make life so much easier - can watch television on my own schedule. So while I have decided not to make my goal in life getting so morbidly obese that I merge with my sofa (there is a nasty story about that in the paper at http://www.palmbeachpost.com/localnews/content/martin_stlucie/epaper/2004/08/18/s1a_mcbody_0818.html), I am never going to give up television.